Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Fifty Shades of Egregious Bologna Wands

I haven't read Fifty Shades yet. I will, one of these days. I'm reading a  lot of cookbooks at the minute. Saucy!

But I've enjoyed all the fascinating hoo-ha surrounding it. I love the notion that sales of erotica have leapt with the growing popularity of e-readers. Nobody has to look at the racy cover of your Black Lace edition of Thighs On Fire anymore. 

My sister Sam sent me this review and I lolled myself silly. It is too, too funny, although if you are offended by phrases such as 'bologna wand' you may want to turn your attention elsewhere. Me, I live for such phraseology, and applaud anybody who takes the time to create such a thrilling and yet ultimately pointless piece of work as this review. I also applaud the brilliant female podcaster who used the wonderful term 'egregious thatch' to describe unruly body hair this week. I have spent today trying and failing to insert this term into conversation. .

Maybe tomorrow?


  1. That review is HILARIOUS and so accurate. I read it, it was so shit, but handy as now I have a benchmark: if people say they liked it then I can never trust their recommendation on a book or a movie ever again. It was possibly the worst written worst plot I have actually finished. and really a virgin who can have multiple orgasms and perform fellatio like a master? Give.me.a break. did I spell fellatio right? don't think I have ever written the word.

    1. Yes, Cath, straight to the top of the class! The reviews of how bad this book is are almost driving me to read it for comedy purposes.

  2. Rach, I'm laughing for the first time in days remembering the Melbourne trip that involved whole conversations where we could only use such terms...'map of tassie' etc....we were only 20...and there was too much alcohol etc involved...would have been good to add these to that holiday...how funny...xx


Thanks for talking to me. I don't got cooties. Oh, except for when I got cooties.