Friday, July 9, 2010

In Which Comedy and Chocolate Don't Mix.

I was standing in line at BiLo when I realised that the businessman in front of me had lightly rested his Tam Tams on the grocery-divider.

Problematically, the comedy switch in my brain always favors funny over appropriate, and the edit filter was never installed, so I didn't hesitate to say 'ooh, I'll have those,' in a bad comedy accent, pick up his biscuits and put them on my side of the barrier.

It wasn't champagne comedy, it's true. I was just looking for a little light relief in a crazy, mixed-up world, but I picked the wrong patsy. The businessman didn't appreciate my subtle comedic satire on supermarket mores. He snatched his Tim Tams back angrily and placed them firmly on his side of the barrier. For the next five minutes there was a terribly awkward silence.

He'll probably turn out to be the husband of some mother at pre-school, and I'll meet him at a working bee, and we'll always have a terrible, unspoken, secret past.


  1. I thought it was just me that suffered these awkward moments. PHEW! Solidarity in numbers sistah!

  2. Well I'm laughing. I think it is very funny.

  3. That's so funny! "Lighten up, businessman" I say...

  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

  5. Serena Finn Watkins, Blogger deleted your comment,but emailed it to me. Blogger was offended by the flesh coloured pantyhose, but I thought they were too good not to share:

    You need to come to the supermarket in Switzerland. The people here just about shit their pants if there's a shortage of grocery dividers and they have to improvise with just plain old space between purchases. You can see them calculating how much space is enough. It's usually about 30cm. Anything less makes them think that all hell will break loose. Yet wearing flesh-toned pantyhose with shortie shorts is still OK...


Thanks for talking to me. I don't got cooties. Oh, except for when I got cooties.